I usually publish a post here on the blog at the beginning of every month, talking about my monthly goals. But what I don’t post about is goals that I have for my marriage.
A lot of people who I talk to don’t set goals as a couple. I’ve talked to people who have said they never thought about it, and wouldn’t know how to, even though they’d like to.
Individual goals are important, but setting goals as a couple has so many benefits too. And it can be super fun!
So today I thought I’d talk about how and why to set goals as a couple…
The benefits of setting goals as a couple:
- The simple act of sitting down and figuring out your priorities and intentions as a couple can be a great way to bond and grow closer.
- Sometimes there are things on our minds or things we’d like to do, but we forget, with the thousands of other things that we think about. Actually sitting down to set goals (and write them down) ensures that we get them done.
- Setting goals as a couple helps you strengthen your relationship by working as a team toward the same objectives.
- Setting goals together helps couples stay in (or go back to) the “newlywed” phase of marriage, by making plans and dreams together.
- Setting goals as a couple strengthens communication in your marriage because you both get to voice your desires, dreams, and plans – both individual and as a couple.
- Reaching your goals together gives you a sense of accomplishment and happiness with each other and your marriage.
- Setting goals together allows you to bring up and work through any issues you may be having, like financial problems or problems in another area of life/your marriage.
- As newlyweds, setting goals with your spouse teaches you a valuable lesson of sharing and working towards a common objective with your spouse.
Tips for setting goals as a couple:
- Make sure you support your spouse in their goals. Encourage them and ask them what you can do to help them. Praise their accomplishments and try to be excited about their dreams and passions. Also, hold them accountable give them feedback when they need it.
- Try to include your spouse in your own goals too. Ask them for help if you need it. Have them hold you accountable and give you feedback. Share your goals and progress with them.
- Make sure your individual and shared goals are in alignment with each other. Don’t let your individual goals get in the way of your couple goals and vice versa. This will allow you to keep the peace in your marriage and accomplish so much more as a couple and as an individual.
- Celebrate your milestones and achievements together. Discuss how you can reward yourselves and each other each time you accomplish something. This will help keep both of you motivated and excited about your goals as a team.
- Discuss which areas of your life and marriage need improvement. Talk about how each of you think those improvements can be made. Keep an open mind, allow each of your opinions to be heard, and try not to judge each other or argue about things.
- Don’t compare your relationship to anyone else’s. All people are unique and all couples are unique as well. Your relationship doesn’t (and doesn’t have to) look like anyone else’s. Only set goals that are good for you and your relationship, not for keeping up with the Joneses.
Areas to consider setting goals in:
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Question: Do you set goals with your spouse/partner?